Enduring Love

“Many waters cannot quench the fire of love.” So said a wise man by the name of Solomon, and I think I'd agree with him. One of the mistakes we make in relationships is that we forget the concept of time. How sad, because even the greatest book of all teaches that there is a time for everything under heaven. Honestly, I'm no expert on living in line with God's timing, especially where matters of the heart are concerned; however, recently I finally understood a part of the concept. A very simple life event taught me, in the most mundane way, to wait for God's time. I learnt that His passage of time is of essence to anything that lasts, especially a loving relationship.

 

When I was only a young teen, I met this really cute guy in my senior class in secondary school. He was my class captain, and so, by default, I had to interact with him. He turned out to be the object of my admiration as well as my temper. He used his authority as my class captain in the most annoying ways. Naturally, I was torn between loving this guy and detesting him. For my peace of mind, I decided to ignore his existence. As we moved into higher classes, he remained my class captain and the distance between us widened. In spite of that, I had to admit that he was really cute - and maybe, to some degree, I was attracted to him - but could I enter into relationship with him? Not in a million years! He wasn't my knight in shining armor, my mind decided.

 

So time passed and we moved on to university, and by some unknown design of providence, we found ourselves attending the same one. Thankfully, we were in different departments, so there wasn't any chance of him becoming my class representative. But these years were different; we had both matured in many ways. We now had at least one thing in common—friends. Could we have had a relationship then? Not in two million years.

 

We grew older and graduated. Two fresh graduates looking for jobs; at least, we had that much in common. Could we have had a relationship then? Not in three million years. That was the last thing on my mind. I needed to get a job. For me, everything else ceased to exist.

 

And time continued to pass. We had grown into young professionals, too busy to have an out-of-office life. We had become our own persons, living in different countries, on different continents. But it was then, at that precise time, that the puzzle fitted perfectly. After so many years, we finally decided to have a relationship. Was it worth the wait? You bet it was! When the time was right, we were ready, and it was just perfect. I didn't say the circumstances were perfect; I said our love was perfect.

 

I realize that our fear, most of the time, is that if we wait for a little longer, the dashing young man or woman might just pass us by. Maybe, maybe not. I follow the school of thought that faith without effort doesn’t work. But I also believe that sometimes the effects of our efforts take a while to manifest. All those years I waited for the boy of my childhood fantasies to grow into the man of my dreams, I had fears. I feared we would grow into different individuals, and we did. I feared that we would fall in love with other people, and we did. I also trusted in the One, from whom all families on earth take their names, to bring us together in His time, and He did.

 

The years my friend and I spent apart helped us to discover our true selves, which was the best thing that could have ever happened to us. I assure you that habits, fears, hopes, dreams, everything, come to light in the passage of time. Girl, if you truly love him, put your love to the test in the furnace of time. Time burns out the entire façade, heals old wounds, and brings to bear what each person has to offer. Trust me on this one. I fell in love with my best friend once, and I didn't choose to love him until a very long time had passed.

 

When it comes to matters of the heart, its best you take a slow pill and let God bring all motives to bear in His passage of time. You will not lose him to another, your love will not wane, and, if he strays a little, he'll surely come home to you. If you take it a day at a time and not six months in a moment, you will discover the joy of loving a friend. No matter how long it takes, you will still be in love with him. Trust me—even after eighteen years; I'm more in love with my best friend than I was when I first met him.

 

The ingredient you need to make your relationship work is pacing every decision you make according to God's timeline. Trust the all-wise God; He makes all things beautiful in His own time.

 

 

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