Tuesday, 6 August 2013

Mordern Day Engagement Requirement

A little something to make your day...
I remember when I was planning my traditional wedding ceremony, my parents gave me a list of items that my husband's family were to bring along as gifts for my family. This tradition has made its way down so many generations in time past especially among people from the Yoruba tribe in Nigeria.
When I got the list, I was a little disappointed by some of the items because they were trivial and had little or no economic value. Now, you have to understand why I was disappointed, because all my  life I was told to act good and be good so when this day came my in-laws would be delighted to pay their dues and my dowry. So to see what was on the list after all my attempts at being the good girl was really disappointing.
I thought, "surely you have to give more to take away a valuable resource like me?" So my sisters and I decided to have a little fun with my husband and we rewrote our own list. Take your time and enjoy the list below and I'm sure you can guess how the story ended.

Traditional Wedding Requirement-  Revised Version

A.        DRINKS

  • Moet  - 2 cartons
  • Dom Perignon - 2 cartons
  • Hennessy - 2 cartons
  • Bloody Mary - 50 servings

B.        DRESSING MATERIALS - 1 Louis Vuitton Suitcase containing:

  • Dolce and Gabbana Jeans - 2 pairs
  • House of Dereon Casual wears  - 2 seasons
  • CK Slimmer Trouser Suit - 2 pairs
  • Prada Bag and Shoe  - 2 sets
  • Valentino Evening Gown  - 1
  • Gold Rolex - 2
  • Harry Winston’s Gold Jewellery - Complete Set
  • Elle Umbrella - 1
  • Ray-Ban Sun Glasses - 1

C.        OTHERS

  • 18 carat gold imprints Holy Bible - 1
  • 4 x 4 inches Heart of the Sea Diamond ring - 1
  • Handmade Emperor decanters from China - 2
  • Exotic fruits from the Caribbean - 1 basket
  • Nuts from Hawaii (Orogbo) - 40
  • Fresh fish from the North Sea (Eja Osan) -  40
  • Pure Honey from Spain (Oyin) - 2 Bottles
  • Salt from the Israel (Iyo) - 1 Bag  
  • Sugar from Mexico - 1 Bag

D.        PAYMENTS

  • Payment at the door (Owo Isi Lekun) - $500,000
  • Payment for the smallest child (Owo Omo Ile) - $500,000
  • Payment for the ladies in the house (Owo Obirin Ile) - $500,000
  • Payment for Mum’s acceptance (Owo Iya Gbo)  - $500,000
  • Payment for Dad’s acceptance (Owo Baba Gbo) - $500,000
  • Payments for the Elder’s meeting (Owo Ijoko Agba) -  $500,000
  • Payment to open the dish (Owo Isi Gba) - $500,000
  • Payment for the flight (Owo Aeroplane) - $500,000
  • Payment to bring out the bride (Owo Mimu Iyawo Jade) -  $500,000
  • Payment for 1st Class postage (Owo Letter) -  $500,000
  • Dowry (US Bailout Plan) -  $700bn           

Will you still marry this bride???
  

6 comments :

Sean Obafemi said...

This lady may likely remain single for a while.

TJ said...

You are sooooo O-Y-O!!!

Akins Peter said...

i would rather remain a bachelor for the rest of my life!

Cetobs said...

Such a good laugh

tybassey said...

Rolling with laughter......den all guys will want to be ladies...lol

Prince David Adetula said...

Long list no doubt! Buh i think if the carrying capacity is there, why not... *hope i'm not the only one thinking this way*